Monsters and Critics columnist Liz Long recaps The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, Season 12, Episode 22, Reunion, Part I, with a little help from a glass of Pinot (or two)….
Greetings, my Housewives-“Lovers.” We are in the home stretch, and yet our reunion journey just begins. (Sigh.)
Last night, we endured Part I of our three-part reunion series.
And while we have not seen THE moment where Kathy Hilton calls Lisa Rinna “the biggest bully in Hollywood,” we did get to see a showdown between Diana and Garcelle Beauvais.
Try as you might to escape the reunion, Diana – that’s not gonna stop Mamma Bear Garcelle from calling you out.
And, yes, there were receipts.
Take a shot. Or pour some Bailey’s in your coffee. And let’s recap.
Crystal did not have a good night on Part I of the Reunion
Before we get into Garcelle and Diana, we need to first address Crystal Kung Minkoff.
Poor girl did not have a good night. And, for whatever reason, Kyle Richards was leading the attack.
I mean, yes, Crystal is the “millennial” of the group. And, yes, “her truth” might not be the “actual truth.”
But where was all of Kyle’s energy that she had for Crystal last night when it comes to her defense of Garcelle?! Or Sutton Stracke, for that matter?!
Now, I’ll admit, Crystal DID do some back-peddling last night when it came to a few things (namely, what the “dark comment” was).
But Crystal’s “offenses” certainly do not rise to the level of Diana threatening Garcelle after Garcelle’s son had to endure racist “bot attacks.”
Garcelle admits she thinks Diana was behind the bot attacks
Diana showed up to the reunion virtually because, as she said, she was “sick.”
I say “sick” in quotes because, as Andy even pointed out, Diana sure did look good for being sick.
Suspicions aside, Diana’s virtual attendance did not prevent Garcelle from drilling holes through her with her eyes.
At first, I thought Garcelle looked this angry the whole time Diana talked because Garcelle believed Diana was behind the bot attacks.
I mean, that alone is horrible.
But then, Garcelle explains that Diana sent her a threatening text message after Garcelle’s son, Jax, re-posted a horrible comment saying “too far.”
You see, Jax – a 14-year-old-boy in the midst of receiving racist threats – failed to “pencil out” Diana’s name in order to protect DIANA.
Go figure. He wasn’t thinking of DIANA’s feelings in that moment of panic and fear.
Even if he had the wherewithal to say, hmm, let me redact Diana’s name before I re-post this, the blogs already picked it up, and it was too late.
Adding fuel to the fire, Kyle comes to DIANA’s defense in this moment!
Kyle: I think what Diana is saying is he [Jax] could have deleted the post, erased her name, and THEN re-posted it.
Garcelle had the ONLY proper reaction to all of this: “ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!!” (And I had hope for you last week, Kyle! SMH.)
What’s more, Diana apparently took it a step further and sent Garcelle this message!
Not cool at all, ladies.
Other notable reunion moments
The other notable moment from last night’s episode was Kyle revealing that the people who robbed her recently contacted her and showed her photos of the stolen items.
She apparently gave them money to get the things back, which, as Erika Jayne taught us all, is called a “shakedown.”
Also, after Crystal changed her story about the “dark comment,” now saying it was more just a vibe she got, Sutton was willing to forgive and forget.
Of course, all the other ladies (plus Andy) weren’t willing to be so quick to forgive.
Rinna and Erika especially:
Next week, Kathy and her slippers arrive!
And the real juice begins.
Til next week, my Housewives-Lovers!
The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills airs Wednesdays at 8/7c on Bravo.