Recap

RHOBH Red Wine Recap: Andy please take their Diamonds

Erika Jayne gives a glaring look
Erika Jayne is just one diamond that Andy needs to take away after last night’s RHOBH Disco Inferno debacle. Pic credit: Bravo

Monsters and Critics columnist Liz Long recaps The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, Season 12, Episode 15, Disco Inferno, with a little help from a glass of Pinot (or two)….

Hello, guys. I can’t even call you my Housewives-Lovers because I am about ready to jump ship after last night’s Disco Inferno fiasco.

It appears Garcelle is fighting a useless battle.

Kathy is the only one injecting a little humor that no one (but Garcelle, Sutton, and Sheree) can handle.

And Rinna, with her flat-out mean girl behavior, just needs to go.

It’s like I didn’t even enjoy the show last night and found myself praying to the Almighty Andy to just take some diamonds already!

Pour a strong one and dust off your disco wig. And let’s recap. (Heavy sigh.)

It’s Garcelle and Sutton against the world

Kathy Hilton laughing with Sutton Stracke and Garcelle Beauvais
Careful, Kathy. If the Mean Girls see you laughing, they’ll turn on you too. Pic credit: Bravo

By now, it has become blatantly obvious that it’s Garcelle and Sutton against the world – or at least Kyle, Dorit, Rinna, Erika, and Diana.

Last night, Sutton couldn’t quite let the mouse go when she told Erika how she didn’t like being called a liability.

Now, the only reason Sutton brought this up again is that Sutton apparently got a call from an attorney involved in one of Erika’s lawsuits to see if Sutton would be a third-party witness.

Sutton was merely pointing out the irony that while Erika called Sutton a “liability,” Erika is the only actual liability here.

But do any of the ladies hear this? Or even TRY to see where Sutton is coming from.

Noooooooooo.

And what’s more, did any of them come to Sutton’s defense when Erika was throwing out the word “liability” about Sutton??

You better believe they didn’t. What’s more – when the one true friend (Garcelle) DID come to Sutton’s defense – they attacked that, claiming Garcelle constantly has to fight Sutton’s battles.

Well, you best mind your manners, ladies. Because Sutton can handle this on her own, but that will not stop our Queen Garcelle from fighting off these “ladies” left and right last night.

Lisa’s Disco Inferno party is just another chance to attack Sutton

Garcelle Beauvais looks annoyed at Lisa Rinna's Disco Inferno party
Garcelle puts her game-face on to ward off all the attacks about to come her way. Pic credit: Bravo

Not only is Garcelle the only one talking with any lick of sense, but she still comes to the party all smiles and is ready just to have a good time.

But when pot-stirrer Kyle again brings up a hot-button topic, Garcelle (and Sutton) are left to defend themselves against the clan.

Kyle: Erika, why did you call Sutton a liability?

Aaaaand here we go. (Did I mention earlier in the episode that Kyle told Sutton that Sutton tends to stir the pot?! I’m sorry, Kyle. But meet the kettle.)

Just another instance of gaslighting that regularly goes down in the Hills these days.

Erika comes for Garcelle and tells Garcelle that she is spinning a “false narrative” that Erika has a drinking problem.

And Garcelle calmly notes that while it is a narrative, just because it’s one that Erika doesn’t like doesn’t make it false.

AMEN, GARCELLE!

The cherry on top was, of course, when Garcelle delivered the classic line: “I don’t have to make you look bad, Erika. You can do that all on your own.”

Erika Jayne yelling at Garcelle Beauvais
Erika comes for Garcelle, but Garcelle holds her own and then some! Pic credit: Bravo

Erika’s comeback? Calling Garcelle a “liar.” (I guess she couldn’t come up with anything better.)

Lisa again flips and busts out bullying behavior – aggressively yelling at Sutton for who knows what anymore. Lo and behold, she gives herself a “pass” on this because of her mom’s death.

And while I, of course, sympathize with Rinna on her mother’s passing, Rinna was doing this behavior toward Sutton before her mom’s death.

It’s old.

When Kathy references Dorit’s “Homeless Not Toothless” charity event and inevitably messes up the horrible name for the charity, Garcelle giggles with Kathy, adding more ammo to the Mean Girls’ fires.

Can we just get a cast where it’s Garcelle, Sutton, Kathy, and Sheree? And the rest can just go at this point?

I mean, Kyle tries to inject some humor and fun, but we can’t keep doing these pot-stirring ways.

And, as Garcelle said at the beginning of the episode, can someone please just say for once, “Hey Garcelle. You’re right.” Or at least you have a point?!

It’s Garcelle and Sutton against the world.

And I, for one, am over it.

Andy, come collect some diamonds before your viewing audience is gone.

I take solace in knowing that Sutton and Garcelle read the #RHOBH tweets. And knowing that the people stand with them.

Rant over, my Loves.

‘Til next week.

The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills airs Wednesdays at 8/7c on Bravo.

More: ,