The Devil Without a Cause vs. The Nuge? Until now, Kid Rock and Ted Nugent appeared to be peas in a right-wing pod, with the former making no secret of his support for President Donald Trump and the latter famously telling former President Barack Obama to “suck on my machine gun”.
But the two could be headed for a possible collision, as Stephen Colbert opined on Wednesday night’s The Late Show, amid murmurs of both musicians potentially considering a run at one of Michigan’s seats for the U.S. Senate in 2018.
Former Apprentice host President Donald Trump — who is a celebrity, after all, regardless of what Hollywood-hating conservatives might think — has inspired other celebs to get into politics, Colbert noted.
That includes Rock (real name Robert James Ritchie), a Michigander best known for marrying (and quickly divorcing) Pamela Anderson, a sex tape with ex-Creed frontman Scott Stapp, and, oh yeah, a few rap-rock hit singles.
“We could soon be hearing ‘what-a-diggity-bang-bang, I yield the remainder of my time,’” Colbert cracked about the rumors of Rock’s Senate run.
Eliciting groans from the audience, Colbert pointed out that Rock not only campaigned for Trump, he sold pro-Trump merchandise on his website, including a shirt that said “_onald Trump. The ‘D’ is missing because it’s in every hater’s mouth.”
“I like Kid, but that really makes him sound like a ‘_ouchebag,’” Colbert quipped.
Colbert then turned his focus to the Nuge, who apparently might also run for the Senate seat in 2018.
“This is really going to split the uncle-who-sells-you-fireworks vote,” Colbert smirked.
Noting that the race is still wide open, The Late Show host then launched into a “live from Detroit” bit in which he interviewed faux candidate “Shriekin’ Joe, the Saganaw psychopath,” ratcheting up the ridiculousness of the scenario.
Wielding a crossbow he found in an abandoned laundromat and saying he was “live from your mother’s panties”, Joe mused that he was born to hunt dolphins and hailed from the “Great state of son-of-a-Bitchigan”.
Even more revealing, Joe admitted he has a 34-year-old daughter — and an 18-year-old wife named Serendipity.
“It used to be named Sarah, till I dipped my D. I’m referring to my penis, Stephen,” he said, drawing laughs from Colbert.
“I want you to get wet, jump on it. I love sex, yeah! I’m the original dumbass,” Joe added, cementing the satire.
Joe then pulled the curtain on his new campaign song, playing a guitar solo on a crossbow — something the Nuge probably wishes he had thought of first.
The Late Show with Stephen Colbert airs weeknights at 11:35/10:35c on CBS.