Who among us loyal Bravo viewers does not have an occasion to quote The Real Housewives on a daily basis?
Any Housewives super fan would agree that no one can serve a one-line quote quite like the ladies of the 11 franchises, produced by our divine creator, Andy Cohen.
When The Real Housewives of Orange County first premiered in 2006, no one knew what a pop culture phenomenon it would be, and what would follow after.
As the Queen of Super Fans, there are dozens, if not hundreds of epic quotable moments that have taken me out – some hilarious, some ferocious – but all memorable.
I’ve rounded up the top 10 most memorable quotes that will most likely ring a bell for any Housewives viewer.
Add your favorites in the comments – there is no such thing as a bad Housewives quote!
10. ‘Hi, baby gorgeous!’ – Lisa Barlow, RHOSLC
When little Henry Barlow got picked up from school by his Diet Coke-swigging mama in her Range Rover, she greeted him with one of the most recognizable salutations in Bravo history.
“Hi, baby gorgeous! You wanna go to Wendy’s?”
Yes, of course he does, sis. You don’t cook! The self-proclaimed Queen of Sundance prides herself on never setting foot in the kitchen, so her sons, Fresh Wolf and Baby Gorgeous keep their figures solid on a diet of Taco Bell and Sonic, and Lisa is A-OK with that!
9. ‘You smell like hospital.’ – Pastor Mary M. Cosby, RHOSLC
During the very first episode of T2he Real Housewives of Salt Lake City, fans were blessed to be introduced to Mary Cosby, the church leader who is married to her step-grandfather. Even though her time as a Housewife was short-lived, her most famous insult lives on.
Not knowing it would lead to the demise of her friendship with Jen Shah, Mary blurted out, “You smell like hospital” to Jen, and the rest was history.
Jen had been visiting her aunt who had been hospitalized for a double leg amputation, and Mary’s olfactory PTSD kicked in from her weeks of being hospitalized herself to have her “odor glands” removed.
The duo never recovered and fought incessantly until Mary left the show after dipping out on the Season 2 reunion.
8. ‘Whoop it up!’ – Vicki Gunvalson, RHOC
Is there anyone who can party like Vicki Gunvalson? Whether it’s the birthday party that she plans for herself, or closing it down at Andale’s in Puerto Vallarta, the OG of the OC only has one motto.
“Whoop it up!” is the way Vicki lives her life, and sometimes leads to a broken leg or a little pee on the bed.
7. ‘Close your legs to married men.’ – NeNe Leakes, RHOA
Was anything more entertaining than Season 1 NeNe Leakes and Kim Zolciak? The correct answer is “No.” This dynamic duo partied, sang with Dallas Austin, drank, and wig-shifted together, and viewers loved their Lucy and Ethel dynamic.
But when things went sour, NeNe went after Kim’s relationship with Big Papa and reminded everyone that he was a married man and Kim should act accordingly.
6. ‘Be cool. Don’t be all, like, uncool.’ – Countess Luann de Lesseps, RHONY
When one finds themselves in Turks and Caicos and wants to bring a mystery man home from the club, there is nothing worse than having one of your friends try to keep you from having a little fun.
When Heather “Holla” Thompson dared to insinuate that Luann not bring complete strangers to a luxury home full of women and their high-end wares, Luann was not having it.
Lu told Holla, “Be cool. Don’t be all, like, uncool.” A lifelong adage that one should always live by, in my opinion.
5. ‘He will never emotionally fulfill you. Know that.’ – Allison DuBois, RHOBH
The Dinner Party From Hell is the “ultimate” when it comes to cast get-togethers. When Allison DuBois gulped her five-gallon martini and puffed on her electronic cigarette, it was known right then and there that viewers were in for a treat, and I, personally, was not disappointed.
The psychic who created the show “Medium” took aim at Beverly Hills Homecoming Queen, Kyle Richards, and mentally read her for filth when she spoke on Kyle’s marriage to Mauricio Umansky. When Allison told Kyle, “He will never emotionally fulfill you. Know that,” it sent shivers down my spine in the best way possible.
4. ‘Your husband’s in the pool.’ – Margaret Josephs, RHONJ
The resident villain of New Jersey, Danielle Staub, and her now ex-husband, Marty, made the mistake of trying to take on Marge. Margaret Josephs, fresh off her bridesmaid’s duties at Danielle’s disaster wedding in the Bahamas, had it with Danielle and her crazy ways, and Marty was there to promptly defend his bride.
When Marty accused Marge of emasculating her husband, Joe, she did what any reasonable person would do and pushed him into the pool he was standing only inches from. Marty was just asking to be pushed in the pool if you ask me.
As she sauntered by Danielle, who was searching for her soaking-wet prince, Margaret simply said, “Your husband’s in the pool.” Classic Marge!
3. ‘GO TO SLEEP!’ – Bethenny Frankel, RHONY
Scary Island might be THE most iconic Housewives episode of all time. Bethenny was pregnant with baby Brynn and Kelly Bensimon was drunk on gummy bears and jelly beans. After spending an evening preparing dinner for her castmates while in St. John, Bethenny finally had enough of Kelly and her chef vs. cook debate.
Kelly said she felt that Bethenny was trying to kill her, and Bethenny shrieked “Go to sleep! Go to sleep!” and boy, did we feel that.
2. ‘I cooked all day. I decorated. I did it nice!’ – Dorinda Medley, RHONY
Dorinda speaks the truth. She did cook all day (with the help of her housekeeper, Len), she did decorate (again, with Len), and she did it nice (ahem, Len). This was also the beginning of what became known as “Slurinda,” when Dorinda has one too many vodka tonics and loses feeling in her mouth as she talks.
She felt her guests were acting poorly, and Dorinda promptly told them to see themselves out if they couldn’t change their bad behavior. This is a classic “people who live in glass houses in the Berkshires shouldn’t throw stones” moment.
1. ‘Who’s gonna check me, boo?!’ – Sheree Whitfield, RHOA
No one does it better than She by Sheree Whitfield. This is a proven fact, in an analysis administered by, well, myself.
Party planner Anthony did not know what he was up against when he took a meeting with Sheree, who was planning her Independence Party to celebrate her divorce from Bob Whitfield. Anthony’s first mistake was hanging up on Sheree on the phone earlier, and our queen was not going to take this from the likes of him.
When Anthony’s voice started to rise, so did many viewers’ blood pressure. When he offered to “check” Sheree, he put the final nail in his own coffin. Sheree’s inner voice went Mortal Kombat, and that’s where our number one moment was born.
Don’t ever come for Sheree!
Tell us in the comments! What is your favorite Housewives quote?