Monsters and Critics columnist Liz Long recaps Vanderpump Rules, Season 10, Episode 10, It’s All Happening … Again, with a little help from a glass of Rose (or two)….
Hello friends. Wow it’s a good time to be alive when you’re a Vanderpump Rules fan, isn’t it?
Or is it?
Depending on what your idea of salacious entertainment is, watching best friends stab each other in the back in Mexico may or may not be your cup of tea.
I, however, look forward to this damn show every week. And last night, there were a lot of little “Scandoval Easter eggs” to highlight!
Did Sandoval slap Raquel on the a** right in front of Ariana?! Did James reveal that he already knew of the affair while at hibachi?! And is it just me, or does Ally always seem to be looking at Lala wistfully?
Pour yourself a glass of Rose, and let’s recap.
Scheana and Brock get married but Scandoval is all we care about
Last night Brock and Scheana said “I do” in Mexico, but lo and behold, it turns out they are really celebrating their one-year anniversary because they actually secretly got married one year ago.
Leave it to our Queen Ariana to say just the right thing to Scheana when she revealed this little tidbit to the girls: “So many people want to get married because they want the wedding. But you’ve been living the actual marriage.”
Of course, the anticipated drama on the actual episode centered around the fact that Raquel and Schwartz kissed, but the REAL DRAMA is Raquel and Sandoval’s affair and all the little nuggets revealing it.
Y’all. They were hiding in plain sight.
First, we have the moment of Sandoval weirdly saying “RAQUEL” over and over as he got all up in her face, salivating over the fact that she had just made out with his best mate, Schwartz.
Was he really just jealous inside?
Lala, on the WWHL after the episode, opinioned that Sandoval was probably just giddy that the attention was away from him for the moment.
Mind you, Sandoval recently revealed on Howie Mandel’s podcast that he and Raquel first made out on “guy’s night'”- which was, mind you, a couple of episodes back. That means that at the time of Raquel and Schwartz’s kiss, she and Sandoval had already begun hooking up.
Did James know this?
Well, I don’t know about you, but I picked up on this little comment he made at the Hibachi dinner and found it peculiar indeed.
Kennedy said Schwartz and then TOM, you guys.
What’s more, right after, Sandoval kept saying, “RAQUEL RAQUEL!” I am PRETTY sure he slapped her right on the a** in front of Ariana before they all headed out to the pool!
It’s just gross, y’all.
Lala Kent teases the Vanderpump Rules finale on WWHL!
And speaking of audacity, in case you didn’t watch the WWHL episode with Lala last night, she and Andy teased quite the juicy finale and reunion episodes!
They hinted at a conversation between Ariana and Raquel in the finale episode, and I gotta say – it has me on pins and needles.
Andy wonders how Raquel could actually look Ariana in the eyes as they were having a particular conversation, and I can only imagine what this conversation looks like – but I’m already annoyed.
Because that’s what gets my goat the most. I seriously wonder how Raquel is able to “be a friend” to Ariana’s face while she is sleeping with her man!
I get that she had this breakup with James and is “finding herself” now …. and, look, I’m all for finding yourself.
But she is doing it at the expense of her girlfriend, who has been nothing but supportive of her. It’s almost as if a screw is loose, or as James noted, she’s just lost.
Wow, I didn’t know I had so much anger bubbling up inside of me over these crazy kids.
Schwartz still doesn’t have a backbone
But while I’m at it, you know who else I was extremely angered at and annoyed with last night?!
When he came sauntering into Katie and Kristina Kelly’s dinner, thinking he’d be all unassuming and cute by eating off their plate, it’s like come on, dude!
Get a spine! Grow a pair! Find a backbone!
This little teddy bear act ain’t working anymore. It’s actually just embarrassing. I feel for Katie. And I love her friendship with Lala these days.
I’m a Lala stan. Always have been. And I think James’s new girlfriend Ally is as well. (I kinda dig it.)
Now sweet Ally, don’t go down the dark path your predecessor has. I know you were once on a reality tv show before this, but a ticket to fame via Raquel/Rachel style just ain’t worth it.
Vanderpump Rules airs Wednesdays at 9/8c on Bravo.