Opinion

Married at First Sight: Michael and Meka — Vulnerability and lies

Married at First Sight: Michael
Married at First Sight: Michael feels like he’s talking to a brick wall. Pic credit: Lifetime

Married at First Sight couple Michael and Meka can’t seem to get it together.

These two have been on a rollercoaster ride from the start, but Michael’s deflections and lies are starting to get out of control. Enough is enough already.

If this guy could tear down his walls and stop caring so much about what everyone thinks about him, these two might have a shot, but it seems like his whole goal on the show is to be portrayed a certain way.

He will go to any lengths to make that happen.

Michael and Meka have so many ups and downs

After a fun day getting pedicures together, they’re at home talking, and Michael has that all too familiar sour look on his face.

Once again, he tells Meka he’s not getting what he needs from her – but refuses to explain what that means.

Meka gets annoyed and frustrated because they’re having this conversation for the umpteenth time, and it always ends the same. With him saying a lot without really saying anything at all.

Maybe he and Zach are reading the same playbook?

Michael always answers the same way and says he “needs her to be more vulnerable with him.” Meka feels she has been extremely open and vulnerable and has no idea what he is talking about.

She practically begs him to explain in more detail. “How? What specific ways or things do you need me to do?”

I’ll tell you what he needs her to do. He needs her to have sex with him. I swear if these two would just do it already, this guy would quit being a whiny little bit*h, and their relationship would probably be great.

I believe Michael is insecure (about a lot of things) and feels rejected by Meka – and this is the root of all his supposed “issues” with her.

If the guy wouldn’t have gotten caught in so many lies at the beginning of all of this and she felt like she was able to trust him, they would not be having this many problems.

Their conversation is getting more and more heated, and Michael says, “I can’t talk to a brick wall,” and he walks out. Running away from his problems… like he always does.

In a few minutes, he comes back.

He preempts his return by telling Meka he “needed a break from the conversation” and that he “doesn’t want the marriage to fail.”

Then why do you keep walking away when things get tough? Why couldn’t you tell her that you needed to step away for a few to clear your head? If you don’t want the marriage to fail, man up and start acting like it.

It seems as if Michael took his time away to conjure up a list of things he doesn’t like or appreciate about Meka, in preparation for flipping the script on her again.

It’s like every time this guy acts a fool; he feels the need to turn the situation back on to her in some way, to deflect from his bad behavior.

He proceeds to tell her that he doesn’t “appreciate” her “aggressive” hand gestures when she gets frustrated. Really, Michael? That’s all you could come up with?

Yes, Meka is very expressive with her hands when she talks, and yes, she has been getting very frustrated with you and your conversations, and yes, her hand gestures have reflected those frustrations.

So, what’s your point? Maybe if you quit causing her so much frustration, this wouldn’t be happening?

Meka is starting to recognize Michael’s deflective behavior pattern and doesn’t let him get away with it this time.

She owns up to her hand-talking and immediately brings up the fact that she has asked him nicely (more than once) not to walk away when they’re having tough conversations.

He keeps storming off and expects everything to be okay when he returns.

As usual, Michael always likes to end every conversation on a good note, with him looking like a good guy, so he says, “let’s table this conversation for now and go enjoy our cooking class.”

In a previous scene, we see Meka angry about another lie Michael has told her.

Michael planned a Yoga date for them at a studio where he claimed to be a Yoga teacher. Meka went to meet him there, and when she arrived, she was told that there was no Michael that taught classes there, and “the only Michael that works here is the one that cleans the rooms.”

What? He doesn’t teach Yoga there? He might be the guy who cleans the rooms? WTF Michael? Why on earth would you tell Meka to go there if it was the center of another big fat lie?

Meka has caught Michael in so many lies now that she can barely keep track. She may as well start calling him Pinocchio.

It’s no wonder she’s upset with him all the time and doesn’t trust him. I would be throwing my hands up in frustration over this guy, too.

Meka and Michael meet with Dr. Pepper

Dr. Pepper asks how things are going and what the two think they could be doing differently to help make this marriage work.

Meka says her most significant issue with Michael is his lying. Every day she discovers a new lie. She mentions the Yoga incident.

Michael tries to defend himself with a reply I’m sure he had ready for this question.

He claims it was all a big misunderstanding. Said the management is always changing at that studio, and the person Meka spoke with didn’t know him.

Said he wasn’t on the schedule with a regular class; that he was on the sub-list. Lies, lies, lies.

Ever heard of the boy who cried wolf?

Michael is that guy.

Not only is he just plain dumb for putting himself and Meka in that situation in the first place, but how does he expect her ever to trust him, when she keeps catching him in all of these lies.

If you’re trying to be a professional liar, you should work at getting better at it, my friend.

Again, Michael tries to flip things around and put the blame on Meka. He tells Dr. Pepper that when they argue or have problems, Meka is always running and talking to everyone else about it.

He’s referring to Meka blowing off steam to Taylor.

This guy hates when his dirty laundry is aired out because he has so much of it – and is the primary cause of it.

Of course, Meka needs someone to talk to. This poor woman is dealing with a LOT. She has been more than patient, forgiving, and understanding, in a situation most other women would have walked away from by now.

Between the sex ultimatum and all the lies, he should feel lucky she has stuck around.

Dr. Pepper doesn’t let Michael deflect this one onto Meka.

She calls him out and asks him if he is going to take any responsibility at all for not having consistent stories.

He owns up to a portion of the lies, trying to explain away the rest as broken “vulnerability” issues. He never answers the question about why he’s been lying, in general.

Dr. Pepper comments on these types of “lies and storytelling” and says they can be quite common with people who are “scared of being hurt or rejected, wanting more acceptance…” or the desire to be viewed as “more interesting.”

I think you hit the nail on the head with that one, Dr. Pepper.

She then tells Michael, “if you want your marriage to be successful, you can’t lie to your wife.” Tells them they need to work on trust and that they both have to give.

She asks the couple to list a few things that they need for the relationship to work and what things they promise to work on.

Meka says she is genuinely committed to the process and the marriage. Tells Michael that she’s “giving all she has to give” right now.

She’s showing up and being as emotionally vulnerable as she can be under the circumstances and that she will continue to give 100%.

Michael says his biggest hurdle is that he’s “uncomfortable” in this marriage.

Says he doesn’t feel like he can be his “authentic self” because when he is “it is rejected” and it makes him withdraw. Blah, blah, blah. Same old canned answer.

Just tell the truth, Michael

Everyone would respect you more if you would tell the truth. Tell Dr. Pepper the real reason you feel rejected is that Meka won’t have sex with you.

That there has been zero physical intimacy between you, and that is what you truly need to feel “comfortable” and progress in this relationship. Wrong or right, if that’s how you feel, just say it.

Quit feeling sorry for yourself and man-up, Michael

Be honest. The truth will set you free…

Married at First Sight airs Wednesdays at 8/7c on Lifetime. 

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