UPDATE: David Beckham to Los Angeles

International soccer superstar David Beckham will leave Real Madrid at the end of the season to join the Los Angeles Galaxy of Major League Soccer, his spokesman said today in a press statement.

“I’ve played now for two of the biggest clubs in the world. I’ve played at the highest level for 15 years, and now I think I need another challenge,” Beckham said.

The announcement has Los Angeles area retailers, paparazzi and restauranteurs dabbing their eyes with immense gratitude at their impending windfalls.

“David Beckham coming to the United States is … [like] Tiger Woods meeting Brad Pitt on the red carpet,” said USA Today sports columnist Christine Brennan. “This transcends sports. This is a big, big deal.”

Becks is solid gold and is actually worshipped in Japan.  No doubt he will take over the US in a Simon Cowell-Gordon Ramsay kind of way.  Posh will have loads of skinny shopping friends, and may even turn out a reality show produced by Simon Cowell, wait and see.

Note the date on this article may be incorrect due to importing it from our old system.