Smallscreen News

Hilary Swank, The Situation interviews on Leno (VIDEOS)

By April MacIntyre Dec 3, 2011, 4:12 GMT

11/03/2011 - Hilary Swank - AFI FEST 2011 - Opening Night Gala Screening of "J. Edgar" - Arrivals - Grauman\'s Chinese Theatre - Hollywood, CA, USA © Andrew Evans / PR Photos

Tune in tonight for NBC's Tonight Show as Jay tells a tale about the history of religion through the eyes of his “Jaywalkers”.

Hilary Swank takes the “Tonight Show” couch to give her side of the story in regards to an event she recently attended in Chechnya. Later, she tells Jay about a product she bought to bike with her dogs and talks about her upcoming movie, “New Year’s Eve.” Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino from “Jersey Shore” reassures Jay that despite what Snooki says he is not broke and promotes his new clothes line. Dia Frampton performs.

JAY LENO’S MONOLOGUE HIGHLIGHTS FRIDAY, DECEMBER 2, 2011

HERMAN CAIN ASKED FOR SECRET SERVICE PROTECTION TODAY – FROM HIS WIFE.

ACCORDING TO ALL THE NEWS STORIES, HERMAN CAIN HAD NOT SPOKEN TO HIS WIFE IN PERSON SINCE THE NEWS BROKE ABOUT HIS ALLEGED 13 YEAR AFFAIR WITH THIS ATLANTA WOMAN.  WELL, TODAY HE WENT HOME FOR THE FIRST TIME AND IT WAS EASY TO RECOGNIZE HIS HOUSE.  IT WAS THE ONE WITH THE BIG “NEWT GINGRICH FOR PRESIDENT” OUT FRONT.  

I THINK HERMAN CAIN IS GETTING DESPERATE.  TODAY HE SAID THAT IF HIS WIFE FORGIVES HIM HE’LL THROWN IN FREE BREADSTICKS, BUFFALO WINGS, AND A 2-LITER PEPSI.  NOT A BAD DEAL.

AT A CAMPAIGN STOP IN DES MOINES, IOWA, GOP PRESIDENTIAL CANDIDATE NEWT GINGRICH…NEWT GINGRICH IS STARTING TO SOUNDS LIKE MR. POTTER FROM “IT’S A WONDERFUL LIFE.”  DID YOU HEAR WHAT HE SAID?  HE SAID CHILDREN IN POOR NEIGHBORHOODS HAVE "NO HABITS OF WORKING; NO ONE AROUND THEM WORKS, AND THEY GET CASH ILLEGALLY."  SO IT SOUNDS LIKE THEY ARE TRAINING TO BECOME MEMBERS OF CONGRESS, DOESN’T IT?

AT A BOOK SIGNING THIS WEEK MICHELE BACHMANN SAID THAT IN HIGH SCHOOL, EVEN THOUGH SHE WAS A CHEERLEADER, NOT ONE GUY ASKED HER TO THE SENIOR PROM.  IT WASN’T THAT SHE WASN’T ATTRACTIVE; SHE WAS VERY ATTRACTIVE…IT’S JUST THAT GUYS DON’T ASK OUT CHEERLEADERS WEARING A GIANT “ABSTINENCE FOREVER " BUTTON.  THAT’S A DEAD GIVEAWAY.

PRESIDENT OBAMA AND HIS TWO DAUGHTERS RECENTLY VISITED A BOOK STORE IN WASHINGTON D.C.  SISTERS IN A BOOK STORE, THERE'S AN EPISODE OF THE KARDASHIANS YOU'LL NEVER SEE ON TV!

HERE’S SOMETHING INTERESTING; A GROUP IS CIRCULATING A PETITION TO HAVE POLE-DANCING DECLARED A SPORT IN THE OLYMPICS.  IF THE PETITION IS GRANTED IT WILL BECOME THE ONLY OLYMPIC SPORT WITH A TWO-DRINK MINIMUM.

GOLD MEDAL WINNERS WILL THEN BE ALLOWED TO PERFORM IN THE V.I.P. LOUNGE.  IT’S A WIN WIN.