Smallscreen News

Matt Lauer with Jay Leno: October 25

By April MacIntyre Oct 26, 2010, 5:07 GMT

09/05/2010 - Matt Lauer and Mickey Paraskevas - 35th Annual Hampton Classic Horse Show-Grand Prix Sunday on August 5, 2010 - Hampton Classic Show Grounds - Bridgehampton, NY, USA © Jakes Van Der Watt / PR Photos

The Tonight Show with Jay Leno for October 25 sees Matt Lauer talk about the rumors that his co-host Meredith is leaving TODAY and Martha Stewart, who was at ABC's "Dancing with the Stars" as an audience guest, shares some Halloween treats!
  

JAY LENO’S MONOLOGUE MONDAY, OCTOBER 25, 2010

I SAW SOME KIDS WALKING AROUND WITH PAPER BAGS ON THEIR HEADS. I SAID, “YOU GETTING READY FOR HALLOWEEN?”  THEY SAID, “NO, NO, WE ARE JUST WE'RE DENVER BRONCOS FANS."

WHAT HAPPENED?  THE OAKLAND RAIDERS SCORED AN NFL SEASON-HIGH 59 POINTS AGAINST THE DENVER BRONCOS. IT WAS THE MOST POINTS SCORED IN THE HISTORY OF THE FRANCHISE. USUALLY WHEN SOMEONE GETS BEATEN THAT BAD AT A RAIDERS GAME, IT'S IN THE PARKING LOT.  THAT DOESN’T HAPPEN.

BRETT FAVRE RETURNED TO GREEN BAY YESTERDAY TO FACE HIS OLD TEAM, THE PACKERS. THE VIKINGS LOST TO THE PACKERS 28-24.  BRETT FAVRE SAID THE LOST WAS DEVASTATING. IN FACT, FAVRE WAS SO UPSET AFTER THE GAME, EVEN HIS PENIS REFUSED TO POSE FOR PICTURES. NO PICTURES!

MARTHA STEWART IS HERE TONIGHT.  I WAS THINKING ABOUT THE FAMILIES THAT LIVE IN HER NEIGHBORHOOD, HOW INTIMIDATING IT MUST BE FOR THEM ON HALLOWEEN.  KIDS COME TO YOUR DOOR AND YOU’RE HANDING OUT THE FUN SIZE SNICKERS BARS AND THE STALE CANDY CORN AND MARTHA IS GIVING OUT HAND PAINTED M&M'S MADE FROM COCOA FROM HER OWN LITTLE RAINFOREST…. EACH END DETAILED…

ALL OVER L.A. THIS WEEK KIDS ARE GOING TO SCHOOL DRESSED AS WITCHES AND WARLOCKS.  THAT'S WHAT I LOVE ABOUT THIS TOWN—DRESS UP AS SANTA CLAUS FOR CHRISTMAS AND THE SUPREME COURT SHUTS DOWN THE SCHOOL.  SATAN STOPS BY WITH A BUNCH OF VAMPIRES…HERE’S A TREAT.  HAVE THE TIME OF YOUR LIVES.

THIS IS UNBELIEVABLE…  THE MAN DICK CHENEY SHOT IN THE FACE ON THAT HUNTING TRIP…LIKE FOUR YEARS AGO…REMEMBER DICK CHENEY SHOT THAT GUY IN THE FACE?  THE MAN SAYS THAT CHENEY HAS NEVER APOLOGIZED.  HEY PAL, JOIN THE CLUB!  THE REST OF THE COUNTRY IS WAY IN FRONT OF YOU.  GET IN LINE.

ACCORDING TO "THE NEW YORK POST", ELIOT SPITZER'S NEW SHOW ON CNN IS HAVING TROUBLE BOOKING GUESTS. WELL OF COURSE, THEY ONLY PAY SCALE.  IF YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT ELIOT SPITZER’S PAST, HE PAYS $5,000 AN HOUR, USUALLY.

ACCORDING TO A NEW L.A. TIMES POLL IN THIS GUBERNATORIAL RACE HERE IN CALIFORNIA, JERRY BROWN NOW LEADS MEG WHITMAN 52 PERCENT TO 39 PERCENT.  SHE SPENT $163 MILLION OF HER OWN MONEY AND SHE’S BEHIND BY 13 POINTS.   THAT'S THE BIGGEST EXPENDITURE OF MONEY FOR A LOSS SINCE THE YANKEES.

THIS IS VERY BIZARRE.  POLICE IN SEATTLE ARRESTED A MAN IN SEWARD PARK AFTER OFFICERS CAUGHT THE GUY HAVING SEX WITH HIS OWN CAR.  NOW WOULD THAT BE A CARJACKING?  HOW DOES THAT WORK?

IN HIS NEW AUTOBIOGRAPHY, KEITH RICHARDS, OF THE ROLLING STONES, SAYS IN THIS NEW STARTLING BOOK…HE SAYS HE LOVES A GOOD HIGH.  TALK ABOUT A REVEALING BOOK?  WHO COULD HAVE GUESSED THAT?