Smallscreen News

John C. Reilly and Dave Salmoni on Leno, video

By April MacIntyre Jul 8, 2010, 6:00 GMT

US actor John C. Reilly attends the Philadelphia 76ers at Los Angeles Lakers basketball game in Los Angeles, California, USA, 26 February 2010. EPA/PAUL BUCK

The California earthquake was caught as NBC star Jay Leno was taping his show.

Animal Planet star and resident hunk Dave Salmoni brings his animals and John C. Reilly jumps around so much that he doesn't even feel the 5.9 earthquake that hit during his interview.  Big Boi performs too.

Clip:

JAY LENO’S MONOLOGUE  WEDNESDAY, JULY 7, 2010

YOU PEOPLE ARE SO LUCKY YOU LIVE IN CALIFORNIA.  THIS HEAT WAVE BACK EAST IS JUST UNBELIEVABLE.  IT WAS SO HOT IN BALTIMORE THE TEAM BEATING THE ORIOLES ACTUALLY HAD TO WORK UP A SWEAT.  THAT’S HOW BAD…

IT WAS SO HOT IN NEW YORK CITY; MEL GIBSON CALLED AL SHARPTON JUST TO GET THE COLD SHOULDER.  THAT’S HOW BAD.

HEY RICKEY, WHAT'S THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN LINDSAY LOHAN AND LEBRON JAMES? WE KNOW WHERE LINDSAY LOHAN IS GOING.

THAT’S THE BIG STORY.  LOOKS LIKE LINDSAY LOHAN IS HEADED TO JAIL. AND THIS TIME IT'S NOT TO VISIT HER DAD.

YESTERDAY, A BEVERLY HILLS JUDGE SENTENCED LINDSAY LOHAN TO NINETY DAYS IN JAIL, FOR VIOLATION OF PAROLE.  SHE FAILED TO ATTEND HER ALCOHOL-AWARENESS CLASSES.  SO LET THAT BE A LESSON TO YOU – IN HOLLYWOOD, IT DOESN'T MATTER WHETHER YOU'RE A BIG CELEBRITY OR NOT -- IF YOU HAVEN'T HAD A HIT MOVIE IN TWO YEARS, THEY ARE GOING TO LOCK YOUR ASS UP.  THAT’S THE WAY IT WORKS.

IT LOOKS LIKE LINDSAY WILL SPEND 90 DAYS IN JAIL, FOLLOWED BY 90 DAYS IN REHAB.  THEN FINALLY ENDING WITH “DANCING WITH THE STARS.”

VICE PRESIDENT JOE BIDEN MADE A SURPRISE VISIT TO IRAQ ON JULY 4TH.  IT WAS A SURPRISE BECAUSE BIDEN THOUGHT HE WAS GOING TO DES MOINES FOR A FUNDRAISER.

WHILE VICE PRESIDENT BIDEN WAS AWAY REPUBLICAN PARTY CHAIRMAN MICHAEL STEELE TOOK OVER THE JOB OF SAYING EMBARRASSING THINGS YOU HAVE TO APOLOGIZE FOR LATER.

DID YOU HEAR ABOUT THIS?  MICHAEL STEELE IS IN TROUBLE FOR SAYING THAT THE WAR IN AFGHANISTAN WAS OBAMA’S WAR AND IT WAS UN-WINNABLE.  IN FACT, STEELE FELT SO SORRY FOR WHAT HE SAID, TODAY HE WENT TO HIS FAVORITE BONDAGE NIGHT CLUB AND DEMANDED TO BE SPANKED.

ACCORDING TO THE NATIONAL ENQUIRER, THE CHAIRMAN OF BP…REMEMBER THE GUY WHO SAID, “WE WANT TO HELP THE SMALL PEOPLE.”  REMEMBER THAT GUY?  CARL-HENRIC SVANBERG HAD AN AFFAIR WITH A MARRIED WOMAN THAT LED TO HER DIVORCE.  ANOTHER EXAMPLE OF BP’S RECKLESS DRILLING!

A CATHOLIC PRIEST IN CONNECTICUT HAS BEEN CHARGED WITH STEALING $1.3 MILLION IN CHURCH MONEY TO USE FOR MALE ESCORTS.  OF COURSE, HIS PARISH IS VERY UPSET ABOUT THIS.  EXCEPT THE ALTAR BOYS; THEY ARE GOING, “WE DODGED A BULLET ON THAT ONE.”

KELLOGG'S HAS RECALLED 28 MILLION BOXES OF CEREAL LIKE FRUIT LOOPS AND SUGAR SMACKS AFTER SOME PEOPLE NOTICED A BAD ODOR.  YEAH, I THINK IT’S CALLED ROTTING TEETH.

I SAW THIS ON CNN: COMPANIES IN CHINA ARE NOW RENTING WHITE PEOPLE FROM THE U.S. TO POSE AS EMPLOYEES IN AN ATTEMPT TO BOOST THEIR IMAGE. THEY SIT IN THE FRONT WINDOW.  THEY CALL IT "WHITE GUY WINDOW DRESSING." THAT’S NOT NEW—THE NBA HAS BEEN DOING THAT FOR YEARS.  THAT’S NOTHING NEW.

LEBRON JAMES IS GOING TO ANNOUNCE WHERE HE'S GOING DURING AN HOUR-LONG SPECIAL…APPARENTLY IT TAKES AN HOUR TO ANNOUNCE WHERE YOU ARE GOING…ON ESPN TOMORROW NIGHT.  HERE’S A HINT; THE NAME OF THE SPECIAL. IT'S CALLED "NOT THE CLIPPERS".

TIGER WOODS PLAYED THIS PAST WEEKEND AT THE AT&T NATIONAL GOLF TOURNAMENT, AND TIGER SAYS FANS GAVE HIM "A GREAT RECEPTION."  WHICH IS THE ONLY TIME YOU'LL EVER SEE THE WORDS "GREAT RECEPTION" AND "AT&T" IN THE SAME SENTENCE.