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Heidi Montag brings the wood to Miss Universe broadcast VIDEO

By April MacIntyre Aug 24, 2009, 15:47 GMT

08/06/2009 - Heidi Montag -For whatever reason, producers made a deal with the devil known as Speidi and actually booked the blonde to perform on the beauty pageant.  © David Gabber / PR Photos

08/06/2009 - Heidi Montag -For whatever reason, producers made a deal with the devil known as Speidi and actually booked the blonde to perform on the beauty pageant. © David Gabber / PR Photos

There's an old Persian proverb and saying, "You can't polish a turd."

No truer words were spoken after witnessing the piece of plastic-enhanced wood known as Heidi Montag in last night's Miss Universe broadcast dance and sing.

For whatever reason, producers made a deal with the devil known as Speidi and actually booked the blonde to perform on the beauty pageant.

Montag, wearing an appropriate outfit to not-so-subtly underscore her song, "Body Language," tried to keep up with the dancers,

Montag is just off the NBC reality show "I'm a Celebrity"' where she cried and prayed for Jesus to intervene and save her from snakes, bugs and co-contestants who messed with her hair product.

She also just posed for a mud-caked spread in Playboy, all super soft-core bikini poses, no graphic money shots.

"Everyone is going to talk about Heidi's performance and the worse she is the more talk there will be," An NBC prioduction insider told FOX News.

 

 



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