Recap: ‘The Hills’ Spencer Pratt is full of baloney

Watching the latest episode of “The Hills” is more painful than childbirth.

In Telenovela levels of manufactured drama, Spencer travels to Colorado to meet Heidi’s family and Lauren and the girls head to Brody’s beach-side BBQ in Malibu.

Audrina and Burpy McHoodie Justin take a walk on a manky section of a beach in Malibu, rotting seaweed everywhere, to plop down and have a moment.  Short lived.

Spencer und Heidi trek to Crested Butte, Colorado, where Heidi’s waiting parents have no poker faces or time to talk out of the sides of their mouth. 

Spencer calls Pratt-packer Brody Jenner on the sly. “She is from a different world, Mr. Jenner I will tell you that.”   

Dad takes Spencer to the Paddock for a little man-to-man, and the “all her eggs in one basket” speech flies over Spencer’s head, the horses are disturbed by his presence too.

Mom takes “Hides”” aside for a little “What the hell happened,” talk, where Heidi clams up.

Like those sex tape rumors started themselves.

They know what we all do, that Heidi crapped the proverbial bed letting the little devious Prattster worm his way in to her life, upsetting Lauren Conrad, and essentially causing the majority of Hills devotees to ostracize the “Hides.”

Montag is seen wearing “I Got Tricked” T-shirt in US magazine.  Really?

“Spencer used to brag about how he wanted to be famous and he’d do it by becoming an It couple with Heidi,” a “Hills” insider spilled to US Magazine.

The magazine tells of how Pratt told Details magazine that his goal was to date every girl on “The Hills,” and that he “even dated costar Audrina Patridge behind Montag’s back.”  Really?

Tearful melodrama at the end of the show when Audrina realizes what a waste of life Justin is, swears her love to a squiffy LC, and also in far away in Colorado where the I love yous are flying fast and furious, as deep as a pile of fresh horse manure.

Note the date on this article may be incorrect due to importing it from our old system.

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