If last week was all about Speidi, this week’s “Marriage Boot Camp” on WEtv was all about Reid and Aviva Drescher. And none of it was positive.
Apparently after the big throw down last week, Aviva and Reid tried to go to bed while the rest of the crew stayed up to party and bond. Behaving like the badly-behaved, unsupervised teenagers that they are, Natalie and Heidi spent the night banging on their door yelling at them to come out and party. Pretty much all night long.
“These people are drunk 2-4-7,” Aviva says. “I didn’t come to Marriage Boot Camp to party, I came here to strengthen my communication and my bond with you,” Aviva rants to Reid
It’s seriously hostile when they all meet up at breakfast.
“That’s not a way to invite somebody to a party, that’s just like crazy,” Aviva bitches.
Heidi’s playing the little girl “we just wanted you to play with us” crap again. Somebody smack her, please. Oh wait! Not the face!
“It’s pretty easy to get in touch with your emotions when you’re wasted, right? Not so easy when you’re sober,” Aviva tries to make a point. They miss it.
“They’re older. They’re tired. Eleven o’clock is late,” Natalie says, as if she understands and wasn’t the instigator the previous night.
“They don’t drink all night and still have fun – no disrespect because I’m going to be your age someday,” Natalie tells them. She is so full of shit. And being bitchy like that is only going to come back to bite her in that ass someday. #Karma
“I was just trying to come get you guys,” Heidi explains innocently.
“Aviva and Reid don’t care. They’re not going to listen. They don’t care what you say. It’s like talking to a wall,” Heidi whines.
The disagreement is interrupted by the call to the first boot camp exercise of the day. But, thanks to Aviva and Reid cheating, it turns into a disaster.
The campers write lists of what their spouses are selfish about and then they have to feed each other a series of items (nothing gross except the meatballs). But Aviva and Reid don’t want to eat the cupcake, hot dog, éclair, etc. and are hiding them in a napkin on the couch. And they get caught. Of course.
“If you keep cheating, I swear I’m going to get a cupcake and shove it up your ass, Natalie tells Aviva. I was rolling.
“It’s really not fair because I eat less, than for example, Natalie,” Aviva says. OH NO SHE DIDN’T. Oh yes, she did say that.
Natalie is pissed and a food fight ensues. Rachel hides behind her board. Nobody’s taking this exercise seriously anymore.
“You wanna start a war, you can,” Natalie threatens and smashes Aviva’s hair with a cupcake.
“You just did,” Aviva retorts. “Her hand just struck my face.” No, it was a cupcake.
“As long as Aviva and Reid skirt the rules of our exercises, they won’t only hurt their own development, they’ll also be a distraction to the other couples,” Director Elizabeth Carroll says.
“We don’t care,” Reid tells Natalie. He basically tells them all they don’t give a fuck what their housemates think.
“You’re the baddest girl, you win. You’re the baddest girl in the house,” Aviva mocks Natalie.
Elizabeth and Jim Carroll break up the drill and take Aviva and Reid for a one on one. But they don’t really talk about the fact they’re cheating and not giving 100 percent, which surprised me. Instead, Aviva and Reid treat it like a bitch-fest to air their complaints.
“I think some of the group are getting tired and stressed out… and they’re lashing out,” Reid says. Oh, okay, Mr. Logical. That’s why your wife just took a cupcake to the head.
“Her fist hit my face. That’s assault. We’re dealing with people here who are at best barbaric,” Aviva says. OMG. Seriously? SERIOUSLY??? It was a food fight, Aviva. Get a grip.
Jim agrees the behavior isn’t okay but Elizabeth says it’s about how they respond to their environment. She tries to give them some ways to communicate with the house mates that won’t instigate fights.
“So I think you made some really great points with them. What we didn’t do was bust them for a sense of entitlement a sense that they should have special privileges. And they’ve done this since day one,” Elizabeth points out afterwards.
“There’s just bigger walls to break through,” Jim says.
Meanwhile, in their bedroom, Jacob tries to tell Natalie to stop the drama. He didn’t appreciate the way she handled things with Aviva. So Natalie goes to talk to Aviva.
“I am 100 percent sorry that I hit you,” Natalie says. For real, I’m not sure she did actually hit her. But it was a nice gesture.
Next thing you know, all of the other couples are in the room too and it’s a huge screaming fest.
“It was a food fight,” Spencer says “It was a donut, Reid.” Spencer is appalled that Aviva is accusing Natalie of assaulting her during the exercise. So are we all.
“Aviva is here to get a little bit more famous. And Reid is here to support her getting a little bit more famous,” Tyson says in interview.
“I want Reid and Aviva gone,” Rachel agrees.
It gets really nasty – although certainly not as physical as in past seasons – and Thinkfactory Media executive producer Adam Freeman breaks the wall to stop the fight before it escalates. And to get everybody out of Reid and Aviva’s room. That was kinda creepy.
And after all that, they have another boot camp drill to do that night. Fortunately, it’s a couples’ exercise so they’re not all together. Nothing would have been accomplished that way.
The exercise is called “Bridging the Gap” and it’s intended to help the couples determine if they’re on the same page or not as far as where their relationship is headed. Choose the right door and you meet your mate over a bridge. But if either of you chooses the wrong door, you hit a dead end and have to walk the plank into the water.
Natalie and Jacob are the first to choose doors, and they both pick correctly. She chose to be what Jacob wants her to be, and he chose to stay with her no matter what she does.
Spencer and Heidi chose doors to stay together whether or not they have children. A selfless decision but they still haven’t resolved the issue about having kids. Basically she’s willing to go without to keep Spencer, and he’s willing to suck it up, maybe, so he can have Heidi.
Syleena and Kiwane were a surprise. Syleena chooses to work less so she has more time for her family, but Kiwane chooses the wrong door.
“This ain’t good. This is definitely not good.” Kiwane says when he sees the plank and Syleena over on the bridge.
“Kiwane and Syleena are not on the same path… being selfless causes him to resent Syleena,” Elizabeth explains that he has to step up. But first he has to step off the plank.
Syleena jumps in the pond with Kiwane to show she’s there for him. Very cute but yuck. I hope that was the pool but it looked kinda like a murky pond.
Aviva and Reid chose the same path – Reid’s happy to play second fiddle in their lives. Wow, that was just depressing to watch. I wonder if anybody had warned Aviva to wear her swimmy leg.
“He chose sacrifice. He chose second place in your life,” Jim tells Aviva. She’s good with that.
“You both took a selfless path so there’s hope that you guys can meet in the middle,” Elizabeth tells them. They need to focus less on outside distractions.
Tyson and Rachel were the relationship disaster of the night. Obviously, Rachel chooses marriage. Unfortunately, Tyson chooses to keep things as they are and he gets to walk the plank.
“Now I don’t know what to think,” Rachel says. Is she kidding? Everybody else knows what to think. The guys is NEVER going to marry her.
“I’m totally disappointed. You chose the wrong door,” Rachel tells him.
“We just have different timelines,” Tyson kisses her hand. Barf.
“You’re still choosing Tyson and you’re still choosing Tyson’s way and it’s like… you don’t get it,” Rachel tells him.
“I jumped in for you” Tyson doesn’t get that he was choosing a dead end. He thinks it was an act of selflessness to choose the selfish door and then jump in the pond for her. Has anybody IQ-tested this guy? Dear God.
“Rachel and Tyson have a lot more to worry about than planning a wedding,” Jim says. Yep, I agree.
“I won’t be happy in the relationship if we can’t progress and move on,” Rachel tells him in a heated discussion after the drill and then she heads up to bed. He tries to make a joke out of it and she’s outta there. Tyson’s definitely not getting any wake-up nooky tomorrow.
Next week’s going to be crazy. Spencer gets into it with Aviva. Then they take lie detector tests. Then they get the “hall pass” for a hot night out on the town without their spouses. With this crew, the combination just can’t end up well. I’ll be watching.
Sandy Malone is the star of TLC’s reality show “Wedding Island” and a regular blogger for the Huffington Post and Monsters and Critics. Sandy is the owner of Weddings in Vieques, a successful Caribbean destination wedding planning company based on Vieques Island just off the coast of Puerto Rico. She also owns Weddings in Culebra, Flowers on Vieques and Boutiques in Vieques. Please follow her on Twitter!