People News
John Mayer does not deny Aniston rumors
By M&C People May 7, 2008, 2:40 GMT

03/03/2008 - John Mayer - © Janet Mayer / PR Photos
From George Clooney to Julia Roberts and Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes, it was a star-studded event at last night’s Annual Costume Institute Gala at New York City’s Metropolitan Museum.
John Mayer spoke candidly to Extra about his rumored new romance with Jennifer Aniston.
“I don’t mean to deny it, but sort of deflect it,” he said.
When Extra asked if there was any truth to the reports, Mayer responded, “You have the photograph. You think it’s photo-shopped?”
George Clooney quipped, “I’ll be in the corner drunk if you need me.”
As for Tom Cruise’s recent Oprah appearance which celebrated his long movie career, Clooney commented, “Twenty five years in the business? How old is that guy?”
New mom Jennifer Lopez donned an Alberto Ferretti gown and revealed, “I just started working out this week.”
As for husband Mark Anthony, he laughed saying he was wearing “Men’s Warehouse.” The duo admitted that taking care of twins isn’t easy. Anthony said, “I get the night shift.” Lopez added, “He lets me sleep because I’m with them all day.”
“Extra’s” Coverage of Costume Fashion Gala airs tonight, May 6th!
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Older Talkback
page: 1
Did I ever tell you about the man who taught his ass to talk? His whole abdomen would move up and down you dig farting out the words. It was unlike anything I had ever heard.
This ass talk had sort of a gut frequency. It hit you right down there like you gotta go. You know when the old colon gives you the elbow and it feels sorta cold inside, and you know all you have to do is turn loose? Well this talking hit you right down there, a bubbly, thick stagnant sound, a sound you could smell.
This man worked for a carnival you dig, and to start with it was like a novelty ventriliquist act. Real funny, too, at first. He had a number he called 'The Better 'Ole' that was a scream, I tell you. I forget most of it but it was clever. Like, 'Oh I say, are you still down there, old thing?'
'Nah! I had to go relieve myself.'
After a while the ass start talking on its own. He would go in without anything prepared and his ass would ad-lib and toss the gags back at him every time.
Then it developed sort of teeth-like little raspy in- curving hooks and start eating. He thought this was cute at first and built and act around it, but the asshole would eat its way through his pants and start talking on the street, shouting out it wanted equal rights. It would get drunk, too, and have crying jags nobody loved it and it wanted to be kissed same as any other mouth.
Finally it talked all the time day and night, you could hear him for blocks screaming at it to shut up, and beating it with his fist, and sticking candles up it, but nothing did any good and the asshole said to him: 'It's you who will shut up in the end. Not me. Because we don't need you around here any more. I can talk and eat and shit.'
After that he began waking up in the morning with a transparent jelly like a tadpole's tail all over his mouth. This jelly was what the scientists call un-D.T., Undifferentiated Tissue, which can grow into any kind of flesh on the human body. He would tear it off his mouth and the pieces would stick to his hands like burning gasoline jelly and grow there, grow anywhere on him a glob of it fell. So finally his mouth sealed over, and the whole head would have have amputated spontaneous- except for the eyes you dig.
That's one thing the asshole couldn't do was see. It needed the eyes. But nerve connections were blocked and infiltrated and atrophied so the brain couldn't give orders any more. It was trapped in the skull, sealed off. For a while you could see the silent, helpless suffering of the brain behind the eyes, then finally the brain must have died, because the eyes went out, and there was no more feeling in them than a crab's eyes on the end of a stalk.
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noneMay 7th, 2008 - 09:49:59
he is a fake and a liar putting on a Huvane show to boost his dead career
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