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Obama heading to Russia to "reset" relations (News Feature)

By Mike McCarthy Jul 3, 2009, 2:44 GMT

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zackJul 3rd, 2009 - 16:26:28

State controlled electronic media in Russia daily replays the theme: 'America is the enemy and Russia must become the opposing superpower'. Damn, they even openly support the Iranian regime.

Schoolboy Obama wanders onto the playground with his lunchbox and asks the mouthy, burly kid: 'Can I be your friend?'

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SP4'Hello?'Jul 3rd, 2009 - 16:29:26

'....yes..this is Prez...er...seceretary Clinton...oh...Hello Barak..(sh-t..what now!?)...yes, I heard...going to Russia...good Barak....remember, try not to commit to anything....the ruskies, well, you know...count to ten before speaking.....and for god sakes, if they want to donate to the DNC...leave the room, and send Sandy Berg(l)ar in...yes Barak..I know....why do you think he wears those big pants...no, no brief cases this time.....Mr. Hsu?...who said anything about him?....well, he does need a pardon...but that can wait...at least until the statute of limitations are met...now listen Barak....just look presidential, have whats-her-name at your side..yes, the first lady....in something demure...no red, no blue...yes, pink is good..feminine...non-threatening....and hand him one of those cigars under the desk...yes those...the salmon flavored ones....believe me, he won't care if they're Havana's or not..gotta go Barak...best to whats-her-name..by Barak...bye!'

Jesus....I'm sure glad I refilled that goddamn humidor!'

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