Movie studios always target specific holidays with movies geared towards that day. In a world where the opening weekend is the only box office that matters it makes perfect sense.
Sometimes I believe that without movies the studios would think we’ll forget the holiday, which is why I wonder why we haven’t seen Yom Kippur: The Movie in 3-D yet. This year Valentine’s Day falls on February 12th and there is a huge cast to remind us that we need to take a date to see a romantic comedy that weekend.
Valentine’s Day seems like a retread of He’s Just Not That Into You, and why not? That film was a hit. It seems the smart move would be to get a bunch of A-list actors, throw in a few B-list, top it off with some hot TV actors, and you have a hit romantic comedy. The other way to do it would be to just rent any film starring Meg Ryan from the nineties.
This new film is a story of ten people on Valentine’s Day in Los Angeles. I’ve heard of CIA classified documents with vaguer descriptions. But let’s be honest, you’re not going to see this movie because of the stellar story, you’re lining up to see the cast which includes Julia Roberts, Ashton Kutcher (is it me or does it just seem like he needs to ask permission from Demi to leave the house?), Bradley Cooper, Jamie Foxx, Jessica Biel, Jessica Alba, Jennifer Garner, Patrick Dempsey, Topher Grace, Anne Hathaway, and (everyone is hoping for a nude scene from) Shirley MacLaine.
The film is directed by Garry Marshall, who is known for delivering the syrupy goo in a romantic comedy. He directed Pretty Woman, a surprise huge hit about a hooker who falls in love with a John. In real life that hooker would have stabbed the John, stolen his wallet, and spent the rest of the night blowing his money on crack cocaine. That would have been a very short film and it probably would not have launched Julia Roberts’ career in the same way. The thing I love about Garry is his loyalty. He always casts Hector Elizondo in every movie he makes. The guy is just a solid character actor and I’m hoping he’s one of the guys who finds love in Valentine’s Day, or at least gets to make out with one of the Jessicas.
I wonder if the actresses were lining up for this film hoping to get a love scene with the man of the hour, Bradley Cooper. Brad has been oozing star power ever since The Hangover and he has the distinct ability to make women swoon. From what I’ve heard swooning is quite difficult to do and should not be attempted by lefties. I can just see Jessica Biel signing her contract and asking Garry for a tongue roll with Bradley Cooper on film only to be told that the part has already been cast with Jennifer Garner. But don’t worry Jessica, Garry continues, you’ll be able to make out with George Lopez and he has requested many takes. George Lopez is one of those guys who are hysterical, just naturally funny, but the idea of kissing him forces women to regurgitate their lunch from a week ago.
The interesting fun fact about this film is that it stars Taylor Lautner and Taylor Swift, who began dating after appearing in it together. They are both under 21 years old and have since broken up, so the fun fact just died.
The best thing about movies like this is they are good for dates. Women seem to like them and men are able to sit through them as opposed to watching Dear John. So this Valentine’s weekend you can count me in for Valentine’s Day.
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