Jordan has limits: UK export bans sex with sick hubbie

Americans think they have all the horrendous trainwreck celebrities.  Oh no.  The United Kingdom has some that beat them all.

Hail Britannia, the land doth giveth us Katie Price, aka Jordan: the “glamour model” (topless) with the most gigantic bosoms since Anna Nicole walked the Earth.

The pregnant wreckus trainitis has imposed a sex ban on husband Peter, 34, was diagnosed with viral meningitis, reports the Sun.

She revealed: “We have not been able to have sex yet. I can’t move and he is too ill – we are as bad as each other! He did blow his load once and I said, ‘Oh, you are getting better then!’

“I said to him, ‘I’m not having your medicine balls near me yet!’”

She said: “We haven’t had a proper snog yet because I don’t want to get anything and he doesn’t want to give me anything. So we are being really careful. We’ve just been cuddling and it is so nice just to have Pete back in bed, watching telly. I absolutely love it.

“This house is not a home without Pete. It’s so quiet without him. He is back and it’s like the house is alive again.”

The singer spent days in hospital drifting in and out of consciousness.

When asked if he feared for his life, he said: “Yes I did. I was just getting worse and worse.

 

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