DVD Reviews

Anacondas: Trail of Blood – DVD Review

By Jeff Swindoll Jun 2, 2009, 15:41 GMT

One of the slithering, genetically enhanced anaconda offspring has regenerated to live on in this next action-packed chapter of the Anaconda series. The dying mogul, Murdoch, hires a doctor to harvest a fresh supply of blood orchids and experiment with the regenerative nectar on a baby snake. Overnight, the offspring grows monstrous enough in size and appetite to devour the good doctor whole, before slithering free on a regenerative rampage. ...more

If you find a trail of blood and follow it, more than likely it will lead to a cozy armchair and you’ll find a critic in it who has slit his wrists to avoid watching films like this one again. This trail leads down a snake hole alright and its one that you’ll not want to follow.

Dr. Amanda Haze (Crystal Allen) is still seeking out the gigantic snakes that her experimentation for billionaire Murdoch (John Rhys-Davies) produced. Another scientist was also working on experiments in the Carpathian Mountains with the repulsive reptiles and has gone missing.

Since Murdoch is dying of bone cancer and needs his magic serum to keep slithering he sends in a team of mercenaries to get the juice and kill Haze if they come across her. Some archeologists are also returning to their dig because their first dig team has gone missing. There’s also a college student stomping around the woods as well.

The scientist’s experimentation has produced a new breed of snake capable of regeneration [que Doctor Who theme music] and it’s also roaming around the forest looking for its next meal.

The Anacondas “franchise” made the leap to the Sci-Fi Channel (or whatever they call themselves these days) and it’s been a downhill slither. This sequel and the third one, starring David Hasselhoff, were shot in Romania back-to-back and at least this film says its set in Romania unlike its predecessor that claimed to be sets somewhere besides Romania though looking every bit like Romania. That’s about all the good I can say for it though.

The direction by Don E. “Little Lord” FauntLeRoy is anything but royal. He tends to be using camera gimmicks likes he’s just learned to use them. There were times I scratched my head wondering why the hell he was using slow-mo to show this gal getting shot and falling down. I wondered if he had an onset romance with her and was milking her screen time as a favor.

He then goes from wasting time on slow-mo to having shots of inconsequential things like her going into a tent to get something. She does buy it pretty soon on, but I was surprised we didn’t get a flashback of her before the credits rolled.

I swear that one actor sacrificed himself to the snake not to save the other character, but because he was tired of this film and didn’t want them to try and write him into another bargain basement sequel.

The atrocious cast basically wanders from one forest location to another and awaits the CGI produced snake, if only it would’ve eaten them all.

Trail of Blood is presented in anamorphic widescreen (1.85:1) and is enhanced for 16x9 televisions. There are no special features, maybe because this sequel just isn’t that special?

Maybe the Hoff sacrificed his character in the last one to prevent another trip to Romania or perhaps the mini-bar stock wasn’t sufficient the first time. Whatever the case he doesn’t re-up for this horrible sequel and neither should you.