“Hello, boils and ghouls” followed by a devious cackle can only mean one thing: the return of the cryptkeeper in Warner Brothers new release of Season Five of the popular horror anthology series with a penchant for tongue-planted-firmly-in-cheek black humor and gore.
For fans, the show’s heritage should be old news by now – making its debut on HBO on June 10, 1989 and lasting a full seven seasons going off the air in 1996, the show was a result of William M. Gaines’ horror/mystery comic books from the fifties - comics such as the titular “Tales from the Crypt” along with “The Vault of Horror” and “Shock Suspense Stories”.
The episodes were adapted surprisingly faithfully from the old comics, keeping the black humor and twist endings the controversial comics were known for while also ratcheting up the gore and nudity to sate the expectations of what viewers would expect from an HBO series.
For Season Five, the ‘ol cryptkeeper might be getting a little long in the rotten teeth – it only makes sense that the majority of the best material was used in previous seasons and this season seems to be the first in which some of the seams start to show. The talent in front and behind the camera, while still intriguing, doesn’t quite match up to previous seasons hence none of the executive producer big boys like Robert Zemeckis and Richard Donner jumping behind the camera.
Regardless, there is still quite a bit of fun to be had in this season with some solid turns from Tim Curry, Billy Zane, Martin Sheen and Steve Buscemi among others and even mediocre Tales from the Crypt still pleases me more than recent anthologies like ‘Masters of Horror’ and ‘Nightmare and Dreamscapes.’
Thirteen episodes comprise the fifth season and are spread across three discs as follows:
Some nasty humor and f/x along with a fun little twist get things started off right. “As Ye Sow” tells the story of a middle-aged man (Hector Elizondo) who becomes paranoid about his young bride cheating on him and hires a private eye to find out. The private eye comes back with news that she’s probably banging the priest during confessional so the husband puts a hit out on him - Predictable stuff but ably acted and directed.
“Forever Ambergis” centers around Dalton Scott (Roger Daltry of ‘The Who’), a combat photographer who becomes jealous of his protégé, Isaac Forte (Steve Buscemi) who sports a beautiful young wife and who is fast becoming the better photographer. So Dalton hatches a plan to off the poor fellow so he can take credit for his photos and take his wife. Ouch.
Some great gore effects and a nice turn from Steve Buscemi make this an acceptable episode. “Food For Thought” features Ernie Hudson of Ghostbusters fame as Zambini, a circus performer who can control the mind of others to villainous effect. When his partner Connie (Joan Chen) meets somebody else, Zambini wastes no time in exacting revenge. Solid atmosphere and an expected but still funny ending are the highlights.
“People Who Live In Brass Hearses” has Billy DeLuca (Bill Paxton), a white trash crook freshly out of prison conspiring with his dimwitted brother Virgil (Brad Dourif) against an ice cream man, Mr. Byrd (Micheal Lerner) who sent him to prison. The usual hijinks ensue and of course the plan never quite works out as it should. Paxton and Dourif make a good team but I can’t help but think that a revenge plot that’s successful would make a refreshing change for this series…after all, who doesn’t want Wile E. Coyote to come out with the win every so often?
Disc Two begins with “Two for the Show”, a Hitchcockian-lite thriller about a husband (David Paymer) who, suspecting his wife is cheating on him, chops her up and sticks her in a trunk. Boarding the trunk on a train, a suspecting cop (Vincent Spano) starts all sorts of mischief when they find themselves both on the train. A solid little suspense tale highlighted by a squirmy performance by David Paymer.
“House of Horror” is about a fraternity in which the head Les Wilton (Kevin Dillon) initiates their new pledges by making them explore a haunted house they have rigged with props and noises. Ahh, but maybe those noises and props are not what they seem…”Well Cooked Hams” has some nice star power with Martin Sheen starring as an aging magician, Zorbin The Magnificent, who gets double-crossed by a young magician Miles (Billy Zane) who takes his act and his life. Does Miles get his comeuppance? Is this Tales From The Crypt?
Anthony Michael Hall plays Reggie in “Creep Course”, a jock who tricks the school nerd into helping him cheat for an upcoming history test by having her go to the history professor’s (Jeffrey Jones) house and keep him busy while he sneaks in to get answers to the test. She finds herself in a mess, however, when she finds out they both conspired to get her into an Egyptian tomb to satisfy the urges of a mummy.
But being the bright girl she is, she has a few tricks of her own…this is a fun episode with enough twists and turns to satisfy pretty much anybody. “Came The Dawn”, another episode heavily inspired by Hitchcock has Perry King playing Roger, an antiques dealer, who picks up a stranded woman (Brooke Shields) on the side of the road as he’s driving up to his cabin in the woods. Accepting his offer to stay the night, the two both have secrets that might not make the night.
On Disc Three, we have “Oil’s Well That Ends Well”, a dull episode with Lou Diamond Phillips and Priscilla Presley as two con artists who double-cross their partner Larry (the ghoul himself John Kassir) and then attempt to con some small-towners into thinking there is oil underneath a cemetery. I honestly had a hard time paying attention to this episode despite a capable cast. “Half-Way Horrible” has Clancy Brown as Roger Lassen making a fortune by a serum he’s concocted which ties back to voodoo and a South American tribe. Lassen is fully aware of the trouble involved with the serum and, par for the course, pays for it rather gruesomely. Despite a humorous cameo by Cheech Marin, there’s not much here.
The episodes are presented in their original aspect ratio of 1.33:1 full frame with an English 2.0 surround track. Video and audio are both competent if not exactly demo material and if any older show deserves a 5.1 remix, my vote would be for this one. Alas, maybe for the next two seasons. French and Spanish subtitles are also provided but strangely no English subtitles. Special Features consist of only one feature: a storybook of the ‘Death of Some Salesman’ comic that the episode was based on. John Kassir provides narration as the cryptkeeper for the ten-minute unfolding of the story which is fun…but that’s it?
If you’re a fan of Tales from the Crypt, you pretty much know what to expect and while this season doesn’t quite match previous seasons for overall quality or special features, there’s more than enough here to recommend for completists.
Tales from the Crypt - The Complete Fifth Season is now available at Amazon . As of yet, there is not a release date for the UK. Visit the DVD database for more information.
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